Assalamualaikum dan hi… Semoga
sentiasa dalam lindungan rahmat Yang Esa hendaknya.. Juga semoga Allah ease
everything come hell or high water thru this journey of life... Dan
sesungguhnya segala pengharapan, kebergantungan dan juga rasa yang kita ada,
sedang hadapi ini dan juga kelangsungan masa depan hanya untuk Allah Azzwajalla
semata... And I really hope for that.. Sebab kita hanya insan yang lemah, yang
sering lupa dan lalai dengan urusan kehidupan yang hanya ujian semata...
This just a random post, maybe,
just to wish me for my anniversary..
Alhamdulilllah for these breaths,
for this life, for this love, for this sweetness, for this struggle and all
together that make me as a ME through these day, back and onwards. Dengan harapan
yang saya yang baru ini, punya semangat yang makin kental untuk terus perbaiki
diri dan tetap istiqomah dalam setiap perubahan.
[thanks to QuranicQuotes.com]
I’ve been reading some random
short stories on my favorite author’s blog last night. And it did ring me a
bell on my current condition, situation and relation. Aduhai.. Saat baca short
story tu, berderu-deru air mata turun. Yeah, at some points, being an author
can touched someone hearts. Just through your writing, you can gain some deeds
for your akhirah. And I always hope that my writings also can give some 'lights' to other... Reality. I’ve been triggered ‘that light’ by some other authors.
Always. And I always hope so, for my writing. Sekalipun tak ada yang mampu
trigger ‘that light’ through their inner self, at least, bila saya baca balik
apa yang saya conteng, mampu buatkan saya terfikir balik.. Apa, kenapa dan
semua persoalan yang kembali timbul.
Berbalik kepada post by
Elvroseth. True, that story, at least trigger some of my conscious of being at
this level. And how she can relate the story with seerah… How to make it as
interesting, like a novel for a person like me, to understand something with a
soul. Lively. Meaningfully. And the storyline was, amazingly, want to make me
to re-read the surah and their meaning. For a better understanding, for a
better picture. Yes, there will be a switch to turn on everything. And she did
make me wonder through her storyline:
- What have my study did contribute to ummah.
- What have I done that can relate to islam.
- What can I explain when others ask about my religion. Is it just enough with the knowledge that is so little in me.
Ya Allah… Rasa itu, macam
menampar kuat deria sedar dan menerajang halus lubuk hati dengan comfort zone
yang sememangnya melalaikan kita. Allah..!
Dan paling terkesan dengan ayat
ni:
“Ego manusia itu, tinggi, Yusuf”
Allah, sungguh… kenyataan ini perit untuk di telan sorang-sorang tanpa ada yang sedarkan. Disebabkan kita berada dalam zon selesa, susah untuk kita sedar sebenarnya ego kita dah tinggi melangit. Yang sampai tahap, orang sekeliling tak suka atau mungkin sampai tahap benci untuk tatap wajah kita, dengar suara kita bahkan bila dengar nama kita. Allah, perasaan itu, sakit sangat.
Dan selepas baca that short stories, yang seriously rasa tertampar, dan berganda-ganda rasa sakit tamparan tu dengan other statement direct to my ears. Oh Allah...!
I never known that kalau terlebih memberi perhatian kepada sesuatu, rupanya, ia adalah membebankan. Allah..! rasa perit berganda bila niat kita disalah tafsirkan. Allah, sakit sungguh.
Akhir kata, I’ve been repeating this part of Photograph, Ed Shereen to soothe me for the direct lines.
And if you hurt me That's ok baby, only words bleedInside these pages you just hold meAnd I won't ever let you go..Wait for me to come home~~~
And I always love you no matter what..!
And lastly, my bad, my really bad things is timing. I don’t know how to manage my own timing in explaining things. My act to wait for explaining things always turn me to a really bad situation. Never thought it will turn so bad.. So, for a future me, I really hope for a better timing in resolving my own circumstances.
Ma’assalamah…!
